


if I knew that I could reach you (I would go)

by leopoldjamesfitz



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Compliant, F/M, Unplanned Pregnancy, Working title up until publishing this was Jemma-is-Pregnant-and-Fitz-is-in-Space AU, Yup folks this is a kidfic enjoy, so there's that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-18
Updated: 2018-10-18
Packaged: 2019-08-04 01:53:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16337489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leopoldjamesfitz/pseuds/leopoldjamesfitz
Summary: She missed the BUS from time to time. The carefree feeling that always came with it.But that felt like a lifetime ago. So much had happened, so much had changed since then.She counted the days in her head since this whole mess had started, surprised even that the number was so small. It’d been just over a month since everything had begun.“Oh,” she whispered gently, as another realization set over her. Jemma counted once more, pressing her lips together in a thin line until they all added up to one messy statement.





	if I knew that I could reach you (I would go)

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, welcome to another shitfest brought to you by yours truly. As always, all mistakes are mine, and I do apologize for... whatever the heck you wanna call this. I made myself cry on like 180 different occasions. 
> 
> Enjoy!

She felt sick.

The wind around her was brisk and cold, and in her hand was a small metal urn. All she had left of a man who she’d promised to share her life with.

And somewhere, out in space, there was that same man, some seventy years younger, willing himself to a future he no longer needed to attend.

Because the man who had traveled those seventy years had already saved the world. Whether or not he knew it.

Jemma looked in the direction that his ashes had just disappeared and put the top back on the urn before taking a step back and then another. There was a whisper of a goodbye on her lips before she sunk her teeth into her lower lip and ducked her head. After another moment of silence, she turned toward where Daisy and the quinjet were waiting.

There was a small team of them. Mack and Elena were holding things back at the Lighthouse. May and Coulson were still MIA. The rest of them were on a much more concentrated mission.

“Ready?” Daisy said weakly when Jemma joined her again. Her voice was so quiet that it took Jemma a moment to realize she’d even said anything.

Jemma swallowed the bile in her throat and clutched the urn tighter to her body. It was a silly thing, she thought, to feel so attached to it. Especially since it held nothing now, but it helped in some odd way. She nodded once and then climbed up the ramp.

(The urn would sleep with her for another few weeks, a constant reminder of what she lost.)

Today was the end of one chapter, but it was also the beginning of a new one. They had absolutely no idea where Fitz was now. Where he’d planned to be until the world inevitably split apart and he’d have to go and rescue them from that future. But hopefully, that was about to change.

Jemma could only pray nonsensically that it would.

That night, as the quinjet moved in autopilot, she laid, staring at the ceiling. The bunks on the quinjet was indescribably tiny, making the ones on the BUS look almost like lavish condos. She missed the BUS from time to time. The carefree feeling that always came with it.

But that felt like a lifetime ago. So much had happened, so much had changed since then.

She counted the days in her head since this whole mess had started, surprised even that the number was so small. It’d been just over a month since everything had begun.

“Oh,” she whispered gently, as another realization set over her. Jemma counted once more, pressing her lips together in a thin line until they all added up to one messy statement.

She felt sick again, though this time, she wasn’t as privileged to be able to talk it down. She hurled over the edge of the bed and grabbed the nearby trash can, emptying the contents of her stomach until all she had left were dry heaves. Her shoulders shook and she gripped the rim of the bin a little tighter, but nobody came to check on her. She was almost grateful for that, as she hadn’t the slightest clue what she might tell the person coming in.

Jemma slithered back into her bed once she was sure she was finished, letting her back hit the bed a little harder than usual. If anything, it served as a reminder that she was still alive.

But, apparently, so might someone else.

Her hand felt heavier on her stomach than usual when she laid it there, all the while doing the math in her head.

Seven weeks. Maybe eight. She’d missed two cycles now, and hadn’t even realized. So much had happened in that time. So much pulling her from that reality.

But now it was staring her right in the face.

“Oh my God,” she whispered into the darkness, staring up at the ceiling as her sobs began to overtake her. She didn’t know how else to react. She suddenly felt like she was drowning all over again, but this time Fitz wasn’t there with the mask to help her.

They didn’t know where Fitz was, but a small part of him was growing within her now.

Not the other Fitz – not the one who’d given his entire life (literally) to help save the world, but the one that was frozen lightyears away, waiting until it was time to be that man. _Him_.

She’d need confirmation. Something, anything that would tell her she was wrong. She almost prayed that it would, because there wasn’t a more terrible moment than this for them to have a child in the mix.

(She remembered the daughter who grew up in the Lighthouse after the earth had shattered. The daughter who grew to be strong and resilient and had gotten murdered too young and wished that she had some insight on how to make it better for this baby.)

She crawled out of bed, got rid of the evidence and made her way to the small mobile lab on board. They’d need it when they found Fitz. To make sure everything was all right.

In the dimly lit laboratory where she and Fitz had made everlasting memories, she drew a blood sample from her arm and sat, waiting until the results popped up on the screen and realized that they had one more to add to the mix.

Except Fitz wasn’t there to find out with her. He was off somewhere far away.

Somehow, despite what she knew now, she’d never felt more alone.

Jemma’s hand shook as she laid it along her abdomen, swallowing hard as she dropped her gaze, analyzing it. It was still too early. Things could still go wrong.

But she couldn’t focus on any of that. All she could think about was Fitz, and bringing him home to meet his child before they were born. She shook quietly, a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips as she laid her hand flat and bit back sobs.

“Hi, Little One,” she whispered quietly. “I’m going to get him back.”

 

* * *

 

Hi, Fitz.

It’s day 62.

Not of looking for you, obviously, because we’ve un, we’ve just started. But we will. We will find you.

But it’s day 62, Fitz. And I’ve just found out I’m pregnant and if I’m doing the math right that’s how long I’ve been.

I’m scared, Fitz. Scared of this. Scared of them. Scared of not finding you.

But we will. We will find you. I believe that. I have to. For both of us now.

It’s late and I need to sleep. But I, I needed to tell you. Even if it wasn’t to your face. Not yet at least.

I’ll keep you updated, if that’s okay. I don’t want you to miss this. But you have to, for now.

At least you’ll miss the morning sickness part. You and I both know you’d have soldiered your way through it for us but you’d be complaining the entire time. It’s probably for the better, yeah?

I have to go to sleep now. They want me to, I think. I suddenly can’t keep my eyes open. But I’ll talk to you soon. And I’ll see you even sooner, hopefully.

Goodnight, Fitz. I love you.

Oh, that’s right.

_We_ love you.

* * *

She decided, very easily, that she wouldn’t tell anybody.

It was irresponsible, and there was a voice in the back of her head that sounded a lot like _Him_ telling her that she should really confide in someone and let them help her but –

It almost felt like saying those words out loud, to someone who wasn’t Fitz… it was a betrayal.

He should’ve been the first one to hear them. He should’ve been there with her when she found out, instead of where he was. In a space ship in the middle of their universe, frozen and unaware that he’d already saved their world.

When they took their pit stops, she made sure there was a pharmacy of some kind close by. She knew enough about the changes her body was going through to be able to be her own doctor, and it was easy enough to sneak down for the supplements that she would need, and tuck them into her bag before any of them came back with the sweets and crisps that they got in lieu of proper food.

It was Day 75, and she swallowed the bile sitting in her throat as they took off again. Taking off was always the worst. Her stomach lurched naturally anyway, except Little One seemed all the keener to help out on finishing that urge.

Her phone beeped and when she lifted it, she stared at the notification it’d given her for a beat too long.

_Your baby is the size of a kumquat, growing bigger and bigger each day. They are almost the size of a fig! Swipe to read more._

Jemma let out a shaky breath, ignoring the urge to lay her hand on her belly. Still so tiny. But getting bigger and healthier every day. She was safe. They were okay.

Even if Daddy wasn’t.

She dismissed the notification and shoved the phone back in her pocket before shakily standing and moving back to the lab, where she’d laid everything earlier.

Everything they had on where Fitz might be, which wasn’t much. A few theories. Items that they could remember from their time in space. The design of the space ship, as best as she could remember it, before it had been blown to smithereens.

They hadn’t had a chance to talk about all of that when they’d found each other again. Nor had they the chance when they came back to the past. Everything important had been tossed to the side once the clock had begun ticking on the world splitting apart and they’d focused on that.

It’d been easy enough to forget how much was left unsaid in those moments, but they’d all come rushing back to her in one foul swoop when Mack had come into Coulson’s hospital room that day alone, and without saying a word, told her all she needed to know.

She sighed, laying the paper’s out once more and looking over each one individually. There was something she had to be missing. Some detail they were overlooking.

Polly and Robin were of no help. After everything, the traumatizing events that they had witnessed, Jemma had been lucky to get them to speak at all. Never mind about anything Enoch might have told them about where he was taking Fitz.

The only thing Robin had given her was a picture, drawn in her childish cursive, of a circle with a ship behind it and a promise; “you’ll find him here.”

She’d kept the picture despite the lack of information. It was, if nothing else, a promise.

Polly, although filled with grief and guilt, had apologized for the lack of information that had been given, but told them that there was someone else they could look for. A Lance Hunter that had helped save them and hide them away.

Jemma had only been able to laugh after that, a sort of distorted sound that popped out of her out of disbelief more than anything else. Of course, she’d known that. The team had known that when they’d found Polly and Robin in the first place.

It’d slipped out of her mind somehow. His involvement. She’d known that. Of course she had.

But their problem, as it stood, was finding Hunter. They were burning more fuel than they planned seeking out the spots that Mack knew to be his hiding spaces from years before and coming back each time empty.

The little place in Southern Georgia where they were going to explore next was a long shot. Especially considering it didn’t seem like the type of place that he would hide, but Jemma realized quickly there wasn’t much that she did know about Hunter. He’d always been closer to Fitz.

God, she wished Fitz were here. She always worked better with him rather than without him. But then again, she supposed, that would render this entire journey useless. They could be home, curled in bed, talking to their daughter, rather than her sitting in an emptied laboratory built for them both looking for him.

In the end, Georgia was a bust. They crawled back onto the Zephyr one by one, leaving Jemma to stand in the bristling heat and tip her head to the sky and the setting sun.

Somewhere, among the stars, he was there. She just needed to figure out where.

 

* * *

 

It started as an innocent argument. Frustrations were rising faster than Jemma’s breakfast had that morning and they were all tired. Daisy wanted to give up until they could find Hunter, because they were just losing fuel and hours. Hours that could be spent elsewhere.

Jemma knew, deep down that Daisy didn’t want to give up on finding Fitz. And that’s not what it was. But it felt like it. That they’d put him on the backburner because, well, it wasn’t like he was going anywhere, was it?

She blamed the rush of hormones in her body for her loose tongue, and how quickly she’d become frustration under the thought that they were just abandoning Fitz, even for a short while. She needed to find him. She had a million and one reasons to find them, one of which was growing inside of her right now.

But of course, nobody knew that. She hadn’t told a soul.

And despite being fourteen weeks pregnant, she hadn’t swollen at all – not enough that the flowy t-shirts and the cardigans of Fitz’s she wore around the Zephyr wouldn’t cover. Her hands tensed into fists at her sides as silence fell between them.

She knew they weren’t giving up on Fitz. But why did it feel like they were?

“Jemma,” Daisy’s voice was quieter now, soothing. Not the same sharp bite it had been just a few moments before.

Jemma’s heart clenched, and she felt terrible for losing her temper, because they were all on the same team. They were all working toward the same goal. And maybe the lack of sleep she’d had in the last twenty-four hours was getting to her.

She dipped her head, taking a slow, shaky breath. Willing herself not to cry in that moment. It wouldn’t solve anything.

Daisy laid her hand on her shoulder and the dam she’d been building broke. “Jemma, we’re not giving up on him. I promise. We just all need a few days on solid ground. Mack’s going to reach out to all of his sources again, and I can take a day or two to search cameras from all over the world to see if I can pinpoint a location.” She offered a small, promising smile. “And I would kill for something that’s not fast food at this point.”

Jemma smiled, but didn’t comment on how she’d been craving a prosciutto sandwich with buffalo mozzarella and a hint of pesto aioli for weeks now. They were right.

“We’ll take some time on ground. A week at most. We can all wash our clothes and ourselves and then we’ll pick right up where we left off.” Daisy offered her a small smile, squeezing her shoulder. “We’re not giving up on him, Jemma. We just need to refocus so it doesn’t feel like we’re running in circles.”

In the end, Jemma agreed. She was running out of her vitamins anyway, and they hadn’t ben anywhere with a pharmacy close in weeks.

It would be nice, too, to take a private moment and make sure that their little one was okay. They had enough equipment that she could work something out.

She hadn’t felt them yet, but it was too early for all that. They were still little.

They still needed time, and so did she. To refocus and find their Daddy.

She would find him, she knew that. The question of when seemed consistently unanswered, however, and that terrified her the most of all.

 

* * *

 

Hi, Fitz.

We’re going home.

Only for a couple of days. To refuel and regroup. I think everyone is a little tired of each other. Maybe it’s for the best. But I can’t help but feel like I’m disappointing you somehow. That’s silly, isn’t it?

I know you’d be proud of the effort. You always have been.

I’m going to hear their heartbeat when we land. I think there’s a machine among the medical supplies that, while outdated, could be used to check all that. It might need an update or two, but I’m sure I can manage it.

I’d much rather you be the one figuring it all out, but beggars can’t be choosers, can they?

I’ll tell you all about how that goes, though, and let you know they’re okay. I know they are, but I can’t help but worry, you know?

But oh, good news. I’ve stopped losing my lunch as often. It still hits me from time to time, but this morning was the first time in a couple of weeks.

I’ll just have to figure out a way to get them to stop bringing eggs on board.

Oh, I really should tell the rest of them, but… I think I’ll keep it our secret for now, if that’s okay?

I’m going to get some sleep before we land, but I just wanted to give you another update. It’s been a while.

We both miss you, Fitz. I’ll see you soon.

* * *

When they touch down into the Lighthouse, it’s almost a bittersweet homecoming, but she accepts the hugs and the sorrowful looks and tells them all she’d like to catch up on some sleep. Despite sleeping the entire flight from Georgia to here.

When she thinks nobody is looking, however, she ducks down the hallway toward the medical wing, where Elena had spent so much time after losing her arms.

Through all the panic and trying to recover what they could of the older machines that were on base, Jemma remembered seeing one that looked an awful lot like a Doppler machine, just larger and less compact than the ones most people used now.

It was very unlikely that they would have wanted pregnant women in the Lighthouse for what it had been originally meant for, but it wasn’t as though they could turn away anyone that might’ve shown up that way. They would have needed to be prepared.

She found it, chalked with dust and heavier than she’d imagined, but it turned on when she plugged it in and that was a miracle enough. She didn’t have the strength or the means to sneak it out of the storage room in which she’d found it, so she left it right where she’d nudged it closer to the wall and the socket and pulled up a chair, sinking down.

Her hand shook when she reached forward for the probe, sitting back as much as she could. It was always better when the patient was laying down, but she knew that it was a bit difficult to maneuver that when she was the only one here.

Her heart clenched at that reminder, hesitating for only a moment before she reached forward to the dated gel that had been sitting on the cart next to it and squeezed just atop her tiny bump. A barely-there rise of her abdomen.

A beat later, she placed the probe along her belly and searched around gingerly, feeling as though her heart was in her throat until the soft thuds of their baby’s heartbeat filled the quiet room. She left the probe there, watching the heartbeats on the monitor with a soft gasp that dissolved into tears.

“Hi, Little One,” she whispered softly. “You’ve certainly got a strong heartbeat there, don’t you?”

She laughed despite herself, the sound watery as she sat there, listening and watching the sounds of the life growing inside of her womb.

She had a million and one reasons to bring Fitz home, but the life growing inside of her remained the most important one.

 

* * *

 

Their stay at the Lighthouse went from one to two, and then two to three, and then three to four. Jemma felt queasy. The longer they stayed, the less efforts were being put into finding Fitz, or so it felt that way.

But it wasn’t that at all. Mack had heard back from most of his contacts. Nothing. Daisy had spent hours upon hours looking through every secure channel’s CCTV shots trying to find a glimpse of Hunter. Either he was hiding somewhere where there weren’t any cameras, or he was just smart enough to know where the cameras were.

Both were the worst cast scenarios.

Even more terrible, her pants were getting too tight for her, and the once loose and flowy shirts were becoming taut and Fitz’s cardigan, although once much bigger on her, barely pulled around her midsection.

She hadn’t told a soul, and in everyone’s fuss no one had seemed to notice.

No one but Elena. But of course, she hadn’t said a word, though Jemma found her watching her from time to time. The other woman would always disappear the moment they locked eyes, never saying a word.

It was almost a relief that, if she had figured Jemma out, that she’d said nothing. She trusted Elena, and had become closer to her in the weeks preceding Fitz’s passing, but this wasn’t the thing they should be worrying about now.

They should be worrying about Fitz.

But it seemed like every time they took one step forward, they were suddenly fifteen steps back and they weren’t progressing any faster. They were at a stand still. The only thing they could get from Robin was cryptic drawings. They couldn’t find Hunter. It wasn’t like they had any other Chronicons in their back pocket that knew how to contact Enoch, either.

They were completely, and utterly, lost. And they had absolutely nothing to start a new path. Jemma saw it in the way they looked at her, with sorrow and guilt because nobody had the magic answer and they didn’t know how to break it to her. Like she hadn’t broken it to herself a dozen times over in the loneliness of their bunk with her hand on her abdomen and their wedding vows playing a constant loop in the quiet of the room. Their child had begun nudging at the sound of his voice, and hers too, but it was only little movements. Like butterflies dancing along her skin.

Jemma sunk into the table, twisting to fit her abdomen next to it without pulling the already tight material any tighter. They needed to focus on finding Fitz. Not her and the baby. She could do that herself.

Just as she lifted her hand across the table to reach for the cup of tea she’d poured – decaf that she’d discretely bought at their lost rest stop – the sound of alarms filled the entirety of the Lighthouse, blaring sounds that seemed to pierce her eardrums. Jemma nearly knocked the cup over in her haste to cover her ears, but remembered what that alarm sound meant.

She scrambled out of her chair, as best as she could, and moved to where everyone else was already standing, guns ready, as the elevator to the Lighthouse shuddered to a stop. She pushed in front of them, ignoring the sounds of their worried ‘get back’s and held her breath.

Could it really be that easy?

The doors opened and the sounds of guns cocking filled the air. The man on the other side of the elevator doors held up his hands immediately. “Oy,” he cried out. “A little birdy told me you were looking for me, and this is the welcome I get?”

Jemma nearly cried in relief as she sprung across the distance, pulling him into a bear hug that he returned after a startling moment. When she pulled away, he grinned quietly at her.

“That’s more like it.” He announced, looking back at the room and the guns still held at him. “Look, I don’t have a bomb on me. You can put your guns down now.”

Mack and Daisy were the first to lower their guns, Elena not long after. The rest of the agents fell in line, tucking their guns back into their holsters.

Jemma stepped back when Mack moved to embrace Hunter, and then Daisy falling in line, a look of relief on both of their faces. “Man, where have you been?” Mack asked, clapping him on the shoulder.

Hunter shrugged noncommittedly. “Oh, you know. Here and there.” He lamented, grinning saucily. “Heard from my mate in Winnipeg that there were some people asking around for me. I had to make sure that it was you all, and not someone who would, you know, actually kill me.”

There was a quiet, but collective laugh that filled the room and filled Jemma with hope all at once. But there was still an elephant or two tucked away in the corners. And it didn’t take long to put the pieces together.

“Well I guess if you’re all back here, it means he found you.” He said finally, looking around the room once more. “And somehow, he brought you all back but…”

Jemma felt all eyes turn to her slowly and she felt her own begin to sting, unshed tears building as she smiled sadly in his direction. “It’s a long story.” She told him, her voice shaky. “And why we were looking for you. But I’ll tell you all about it.” Hunter’s face fell as he watched her, a shaky hand of his own reaching across to touch her arm. “Over a cuppa?”

He nodded, looking heavier than just a few moments before and tried to smile. “Yeah,” he said quietly. “That sounds nice.”

 

* * *

 

She ended up pouring the cup of tea she’d poured just moments before Hunter’s arrival down the drain and pouring them both a fresh cup of caffeinated tea. It’d be her first in months, and she knew caffeine in small doses alright, but most of all, she just wanted the comfort of a proper cup of tea.

Everyone had left them alone, and when Jemma laid his out in front of him and sat down, she suddenly wished that they hadn’t. The way Hunter was looking at her, he seemed to have pulled most of the pieces together himself, but he deserved confirmation.

So she told him the entire story, as much as she knew of it, from the moment she first saw Fitz in space until the very last time he saw him, cold and lifeless on a stretcher. She’d sewn him up with shaky hands and cleaned him of any dirt and debris before Mack had come in and the two of them had decided to cremate his body.

Hunter’s hand had found his way across the table at some point, and she felt it squeeze around hers as she let out a shuddered breath. “He’s still out there somewhere, Hunter.” She told him quietly. “The man who froze himself to get to the future. He’s still there. He’s alive… somewhere. We just need to know where.”

Hunter nodded, seeming to clue into everything now. “That’s why you wanted to find me,” he said finally, waiting for her tiny nod before he sighed softly, nodding and looking away from her. “I know bits and pieces. Things that I prodded Enoch for after he fell asleep.”

Jemma felt her heart tug at his phrasing, but she pressed her lips into a fine line. She tried not to tremble under his gaze. “Tell me everything,” she nearly begged, feeling as though he might be the last hope she had. Maybe he was. “Please.”

“I will.” He promised, finishing his tea in one gulp before laying down the cup and turning toward Jemma fully. She watched him carefully, laying her own cup down. “But first, I have a question of my own.”

She looked at him, her eyebrows furrowing, but motioned for him to go on. Her heart seemed to lurch unevenly, her mind going in twelve different directions and none of them good.

“Who’s is it?” He asked, gesturing toward her abdomen. “Or should I ask which Fitz? This is all getting a little confusing, even in my own head.” He wrinkled his nose and shook his head, focusing on her a moment later. Jemma stared at him, confused and feigned innocence, but he knew the difference. “Oh, come on, unless you’ve suddenly taken on Fitzy’s diet then I think you and I both know what knocked the wind out of me earlier. Bloody bowling bawl if you ask me.”

Jemma smacked his shoulder with a sharp gasp, her eyes wide.

“Oy!” He nearly shrieked. “That was a _compliment_. Aren’t pregnant women supposed to be plump and glowing?”

Jemma gaped before moving over and smacking her hand over his mouth before he could say another word. Hunter’s eyes narrowed and he moved to grip at her wrist, but didn’t pull it away as she leveled him with a glare. “It’s his. Our Fitz’s. Not the one from the future.” She said quietly, too quietly.

Hunter pulled her hand away and stared at her a beat before chuckling dryly. “And you’re the only one who knows about it.” He announced as he put the dots together. “That does explain why they all still let you walk around without bubble wrap, I guess.”

Jemma dropped her hand in her lap and let out a small sigh before taking a sip of her tea. She suddenly wished that she’d brought something stronger to this conversation. Like vodka. But even that was a silly, nonsensical thought. She’d never do anything to hurt their baby. She’d spent every day since learning about the new gift making sure they were okay and getting the things that they needed.

Hunter sighed, reaching across to place his hand on top of hers, squeezing it tightly. “It also explains the urgency to find me.” When she nodded quietly, all he could do was smile. Albeit, slightly sadly. “We’ll find him, Jemma. I promise.”

She sighed, and placed her other hand on top of his, squeezing it gently as she turned toward him slowly. “I know,” she whispered, keeping that promise to herself. “Where do we begin?”

 

* * *

 

Hi, Fitz.

They kicked me for the first time today. Proper kick. I’ve felt them rolling around for ages now, but out of nowhere, they came up and kicked right above my belly button. I was so happy that I didn’t even notice how much it hurt.

They’re becoming stronger now, and more frequent. I think they like to know that I’m there and I’m listening. But I think they like it the most when I’m talking to them. Or when you are.

I have some videos I’ve been sharing with them. One I’ll share with you later, too, and then a couple ones that we’ve taken both together and apart over the years. They like your voice. I like it too. I just wish I was hearing it in person.

But I will soon, yeah?

We found Hunter. But I think I already told you that a couple of weeks ago. He’s helping us out. And he, uh he knows, too.

About them, I mean.

Apparently I knocked the wind right out of him when he broke in. I didn’t even have to say anything, Fitz. He asked me, even.

It feels strange, though. Having someone else know. It was supposed to be you. I wish it would have been, but it’s nice having someone to talk to, at least. Even if he is a bit of a pain in the arse.

They’re kicking again. I think they know I’m talking to you.

Do you want to say hello to Daddy, Little One? Hmm?

I wish you were here to experience this with me, Fitz. But you will be soon.

We miss you. We love you.

 

* * *

 

 

Hunter knew about her little secret a grand total of thirteen days before everyone else. In retrospect, it’s amazing that she’d managed to keep it a secret for as long as she has. In actuality, keeping it a secret had turned out to be one of the worst decisions she could have made.

Daisy and Mack were pissed. Even more so because Jemma had been out in the field, searching for Fitz, for most of her pregnancy, save for the last six weeks in which they’ve spent in the Lighthouse, trying to put the pieces together before ultimately taking the launch into space.

They needed to know that they will be able to make it on the fuel they have and be able to find and locate Fitz and be able to make it back without losing aforementioned fuel.

It was a hard throw and they couldn’t go to space without knowing exactly where they were going, so that they’d be prepared when the time came.

But it was also incredibly difficult to plan that when they hadn’t the first idea just what planet Enoch was planning on circling until the seventy-four years was up. They had their ideas. They knew it couldn’t have been too close that the debris would damage the space craft or planet. But not too far away that it would take them too long to meet up to where they needed to eventually be.

However, none of that was on anybody’s minds as they all stared forward and at Jemma. Elena was the only one of the three who didn’t look at her with complete disbelief and mild anger, though Jemma had thought she’d figured her out months ago.

“Okay, okay,” Hunter cut in before anyone could say another word. “I think we should all take a deep breath here. I imagine Jemma knew what she was doing all this time…” Jemma wasn’t even sure how it had all started now. Who’d been the one to figure it out. The only thing she could do was wrap her arms around herself and protect her baby.

(It was a foolish desire, because she knew none of them would hurt her or her child, but it comforted her all the same.)

“You knew?” Mack asked incredulously. “How have you been here two weeks and already known?”

Hunter pursed his lips. “Maybe the question is how have the both of you been around here in some capacity the full twenty and not figured it out?” He asked, raising his eyebrows. Mack grunted in his direction, narrowing his eyes. Perhaps that wasn’t the way to phrase it.

Jemma stepped forward, knowing that he was trying to do his best to cool the situation, but they certainly were not getting anywhere with getting heated with one another. She sighed gently.

“I haven’t told anyone for this exact reason.” She said calmly. “This does not affect my ability to work and it doesn’t affect my ability to help find Fitz.”

Daisy shook her head quickly. “There is no way that you are going anywhere. Certainly not in space.” She tried to reason. “Jemma, your life isn’t just your life anymore. You need to take care of yourself.”

“Daisy is right,” Mack cut in before Jemma could get a word edge-wise. “I’m putting you on minimal duties from here on out. We can’t risk anything happening.”

Jemma blinked and looked between both of them. “Do you think I’m not aware of that, or that I haven’t been doing any of that myself these last few months?” She asked incredulously, crossing her arms over her chest. It was almost impossible to miss the gentle curve now, and she noticed their eyes draw to it. While she was still small, she knew that she was growing at the right rate. “I don’t need to be told what I can and can’t do. I still am the only person here who has full proper medical training. I know my body and I know my baby.”

Neither of them could argue with that, and she knew that.

“I am taking care of myself, thank you. And I’m taking care of them. I do not need to be pushed onto relieved duties. I can still carry my weight.” She declared, ignoring when Hunter said something behind her that sounded a lot like, “there’s certainly enough of it.”

She’d punch him for that later if she was angry enough.

“Jemma,” Daisy stepped forward slowly, hesitantly. They had mostly worked around the issues, and the fact that Daisy had been so willing to help find Fitz in the first place had been a relief, if nothing else. But Jemma didn’t want to hear what she had to say. She just wanted to scream. “Maybe we should just take a step back. At least until they’re born. The stress can’t be good for them or for you.”

It felt as though someone had doused an ice bucket on her. Jemma froze, her mouth gaping open and closed. A part of her couldn’t believe what she was hearing. The other had been telling her that they’d all been thinking about it for months now.

“Neither is growing up without their father.” She exclaimed, her voice louder than she intended it to be. Her hands shook at her sides, tense little fists and she couldn’t recall when they’d dropped down. “You of all people should know that.”

Daisy stumbled, her emotions on her sleeve before she shook it off, holding her hands up. “I’m not going to fight with you, Jemma.” She said softly. “But I’m also not prepared to deliver your child in the middle of space. Or even here.” She said quietly. Jemma paused, looking her over and ignored the flash of hurt.

Deep down, she knew that they were right, but there was a larger part of her that was more upset than anything else that they were even considering this option. It was the nuclear option in her mind.

“You can’t give up.” She replied quietly. “I’ll worry about me. And them. But we can’t give up on him.”

Mack stepped forward, pressing his lips together as he gingerly reached over, clasping her shoulder. “We’re not giving up, Jemma.” He promised quietly. “We could never do that. We’re just saying… take a step back. Give ourselves some time to plan this. Give yourself some time, too.”

Jemma’s lower lip wobbled as she dipped her head, letting out a shaky sigh. “I have been.” She promised, because she was. Even if she missed an hour of sleep or two here and there, she was still eating right. Taking her vitamins. Making sure the baby was okay.

Nothing had and would change now that the proverbial cat was out of the bag. She would still take care of both of them and search for Fitz.

“I know you have.” Mack was sincere about that, and she tried not to shake when he rubbed her shoulder, fighting back sobs now more than ever. “We’ll find him, Simmons. But for now, we need to take care of you, too.”

She ignored the resilient voice in her head that wanted to scream at all of them. Remind them all that she was a fully trained medical personnel with two PhD’s and that she knew how to take care of herself and her baby. But she knew he was right, and that they operated with only the best of intentions. Even if it weren’t the ones she wanted them to.

“Promise me.” She whispered, her voice quiet and shaky. “Promise me that the second you know where he is, I don’t care what’s going on with me… Promise me that you’ll be there.”

Mack wrapped her in a tight hug as soon as she spoke, laying his chin atop of her head. “You don’t have to worry about that, Jemma.” He promised quietly. “I’ve got Turbo’s back. You make sure that you have theirs.”

For the first time, in the warmth of Mack’s arms, she wrapped hers around his waist as best as she possibly could and cried.

They weren’t giving up on Fitz. She knew that. But why did it feel like she was somehow disappointing him?

It was a foolish feeling, one that she tucked safely away. Wherever Fitz was, they would find him, and he’d never think ill of her or of them for taking as long as they had to find him.

She imagined his mind would be on much more important things, anyway. As much as she had tried to convince herself in the beginning, he had missed quite a lot. And he’d only miss more the longer they took to find him.

Mack released her after a moment, but it wasn’t long before Daisy was sweeping her up, cooing a little at the soft nudge of her stomach. “God, I can’t believe I didn’t notice it.” She said in complete awe, gazing down between them.

Jemma would have wondered the same thing, but she’d noticed every single tiny inch, or so it seemed. She’d been tracing it from the moment she’d learned about the baby. Talking to them. Teaching them everything she knew from the periodic table of elements to their dad’s likes and dislikes. Anything and everything. She didn’t want them to not know anything about their father.

Because they would get him back. Whether it was today, or tomorrow or months from now.

It was just a tiny setback. And she wouldn’t allow herself to think of it any other way.

 

* * *

 

“Oy, cold toes, pull them back.”

Jemma laughed gingerly as she laid them once again on Hunter’s arm, watching him jolt and cuss, though quietly enough that the baby wouldn’t hear.

(Since she’d told him that the baby heard _everything_ , he’d been much conscientious. Well, conscientious for Hunter.)

“But you’re so warm,” she teased, watching as he huffed before reaching behind them and pulling the blanket draped along the couch and draping it over her legs. Jemma made a happy sound and pulled the blanket up over her legs and bump before returning to drawing.

Hunter snorted and rolled his eyes, moving back to watch the match as Jemma hummed gently to herself. She was designing the specs for a potential space rover. A small one, just a little bit bigger than that of the D.W.A.R.F.s. It was meant to be able to search out about three hundred feet or so in every direction and be able to trace any close objects from about two to three kilometres beyond that, but it was still in the beginning stages.

Fitz might’ve been the engineer in their relationship, but Jemma had learned enough by both studying by him and working by him for the past twelve years to know enough to get them by. The only problem was that they needed to determine one central location in Space, one that would be sure to have them close enough to find Enoch’s ship. She’d ruled out all of the planets big or small around the sun, deciding it was too close to danger, and all of the ones that were too close to earth, but there were still a number of different ones in their solar system and just outside of it that they could be.

They still were no closer to finding Fitz than they were when they had started it. Even with the information that Hunter had provided him. But this, this was something that she could do. She could draw specs and design a rover that would help them out when it was time. They still were very adamant about her not helping out on following any leads, which had gone from being sweet to annoying the absolute piss out of her, but she was defiantly working through anything that could help them, and ultimately Fitz.

She was pregnant, for God’s sake. Not incapable of working, and she was quick to remind anyone of that who dared to stare her in the eye and tell her that she was perhaps overworking or standing for too long. She’d carried this child this long without their comments and she’d done just fine.

Besides, it wasn’t like she was overworking herself. Hardly. Drawing was soothing, and designing the biotechnical portions of the rover were intriguing. If she got tired, she sat down. Just like now, where Hunter was the unfortunate victim of her newest design. At the very least, Mack had an idea of what she was talking about. He had enough engineering know-how to help her out with certain ideas.

But Hunter? Hunter had absolutely no bloody idea what she was prattling on about most of the time, and she knew that by the glazed look he gave her every time she began to ramble, but he was happy enough to listen and supply her some feedback, even if it was mostly nonsensical.

Hunter had, surprisingly, been one of the only people to not remind her to do simple things like eat or sit down or sleep. Instead, he’d just been there, happy enough to listen to her, even if he didn’t understand anything that she was saying.

She thought that, perhaps, that was why he and Fitz had gotten along so well. Hunter was brilliant in his own respect, but when Fitz had had no one, and all he’d needed was someone to listen to him. Mack and Hunter had helped when she could not.

“Will we have visuals of it or will it just scan back to us?” He asked, though she wondered if he were paying attention anymore. His team was winning the match, and it was close to the end. She probably could have told him it was purple with pink polka dots and he’d likely tell her it was the best idea yet. Nonetheless, he had given her something to think about.

“Hmm,” she pursed her lips together as she tapped her pencil against the paper. Visuals would be nice, if for nothing else but helping them navigate it, but it might be hard finding a satellite at that height that would help them redirect the image. The scans were, obviously, important as well, but she hadn’t found a way to incorporate them. “It’s difficult, because depending on where we are in our solar system, there could be a number of different things that might interfere with it. I just wish we had more of a central location rather than the whole of the solar system and the universe in general.”

Hunter looked over at her, offering a slightly sheepish smile as he quickly replied, “sorry.” Even though she knew that it was unlikely he thought he’d ever need Fitz’s coordinates. “The last time I saw him, I was under the impression that the world was going to split apart. I had several other issues on my mind at that time.”

Jemma chuckled lowly, looking up from her page. “Namely Bobbi?” She asked innocently, gripping onto the edge of her doodler.

Hunter feigned innocence, shaking his head. “Of course not. Bobbi hates me. She probably would have been glad to see me fall between the cracks of the earth.”

She rolled her eyes and sat back against the pillow she’d stolen from the other chair, trying to adjust her back and make it hurt less, though that in itself seemed impossible. Baby was poking into her ribs again, happy enough to kick at them whenever they had a moment. “So you’re telling me that you thought the world was about to break apart into hundreds of thousands of pieces, and you didn’t find Bobbi in all of it and spend what you thought were your last days with her?”

Hunter didn’t look over, but after a moment he uttered a quick, “Of course not,” that seemed far too defensive. Jemma pressed her lips together in a tiny smile and went back to her drawing. She had her answer, it seemed.

Hunter’s relationship with his ex wife was his own business, but she’d hoped that when they’d been disavowed from S.H.I.E.L.D. that they would try to make things work. Perhaps, in their own way, they were now.

“Have you spoken to her lately?” She asked carefully, turning so that her full attention was on him. He made a noise and cussed under his breath again, and she took her attention off of him only for a second to see that his team had gotten a penalty.

Hunter grunted quietly and turned toward her. “Aren’t you supposed to be designing a space rover to help save your beau, not worrying about mine?” He asked, and she grinned quietly at him, poking her tongue between her teeth.

“I’ll take that as a yes, then.” She grinned, and wiggled back down, getting comfortable as she began designing the specs for a potential viewing apparatus while trying to simultaneously keep in mind that it might be nearly impossible to have it transported back in real time. It might take longer, but there was a chance of having it recorded and then once the rover was back on ship, look at their findings then. It was definitely worth a try.

“She says hi by the way,” Hunter said around a mouthful of crisps, and Jemma looked up with a soft smile. “Said she might swing around if she finds some time in her otherwise busy schedule.”

Jemma knew what that meant, and furthermore knew what it meant for Hunter to still be here after all this time. She was thankful that he’d stayed. Although, at this point, she was fairly certain that they were all fugitives. All that was cemented all those years ago likely didn’t matter anymore.

“It’d be nice to see her again,” she murmured, not looking up from the drawing as she shifted the paper and rubbed out a line that didn’t seem to go in the direction that she wanted to.

Hunter murmured his acknowledgments.

Three rooms down, they hit another wall on the investigation, and when Mack came in to tell her the news just a few moments after, Jemma could not find it in herself to feel put down or sad about it anymore. Instead she took a moment to calm herself and remind herself that it was just a small setback. Somewhere, Fitz was waiting for them, and they would find him. She lifted the paper she’d been working on in his direction.

“Maybe not today,” she told him. “Or tomorrow, or even a month from now. But we’ll find him. And when we do, we’ll need this.”

 

* * *

 

Hi Fitz.

Today marks week 25. It’s been a hundred and fifteen days since I last saw you. They say absence makes the heart fonder, I guess.

They watched videos with me today. It was a lazy day. We were both tired. We laid in bed and on the couch and just spent the day drawing and listening.

I found a video of a lecture you did when you were still in the Academy. You were so young then. But I suppose we were both were.

But its your voice, Fitz. They still knew you. They listened to every word and nudged right along.

It would have been better, of course, if you’d been here properly to talk to them, but we’re making do.

We hit another wall today. We still don’t know where you are. But we found a pile of notes that Noah – you don’t know him, but he knows Enoch – had squirrelled away. None of them make sense, or are in English for that matter, but it’s a start. It looks like it might be correspondence from Enoch himself.

I don’t want to get my hopes up. Because I keep getting let down.

I’m trying to be positive. But it’s hard, Fitz. It’s so difficult. I just wish the answer was clear and that you were home.

That I wasn’t looking at delivering them without you.

Oh, we’ve found a doctor, by the way. One that can help me when that time is here. I hope that you get to meet them, too. She’s Davis’ wife. Such a wonderful woman.

We don’t have the equipment here to view them. But their heartbeat is strong. I listen to it every chance I get. And their kicks are stronger.

I swear, they’re already all too eager to get out. I suppose they take after me like that.

Hi, yes, Little One. I’m talking to Daddy again. He misses you, baby. I just know it.

And we miss him too, yeah? But we’ll see him again before you know it. I promise.

 

* * *

 

Whatever language the Chronicons spoke in was as far from anything they’d ever seen before. Hunter mentioned seeing the same type of symbols in Enoch’s home, before noticing the gaping looks of everyone as he mentioned that he and their Fitz had been there before Fitz had frozen himself in order to get to the future.

“Why the hell haven’t you mentioned this before?” Mack asked as he stood up, pulling his jacket on and moving toward the door.

Hunted shrugged a shoulder and followed behind him. “Mate, honestly, I thought I had. Anyway, who knows if this even is still his place. After I hid Polly and Robin, I didn’t see him at all. He could have sold the place or covered his tracks by now.”

“Well,” Mack said, shaking his head. “It’s more of a lead than we’ve had in months. What’s the address?”

Jemma followed behind them as Mack programmed it into his phone. The address was local, and wouldn’t require the quinjet, but it would require a vehicle. Mack still wasn’t too fond of stealing them, even if he did on planning on bringing them back.

When the three of them moved to the elevator door, Mack pressed the button and looked behind him, as though realizing Jemma was there. “That’s not going to happen.” He said with a shake of his head. “Hunter and I will worry about this. You’ll stay here.”

“I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself, thank you.” She replied quickly. “I’m pregnant, not an invalid.”

Mack chuckled, placing his hand on her shoulder as the doors began to move open. “And while I am definitely sure of that, I’m also not going to be the one held responsible for putting you in harm’s way. Fitz will no doubt have my head when we find him.”

“Ditto, love.” Hunter chimed in as he climbed on the elevator next to Mack. “Fitz scares me just an inch more than you do, so I’m not going to take my chances…”

Anything else he said was dissolved into the door as it closed and Jemma grumbled loudly. “God damnit,” she murmured, sighing a little when the baby nudged her inside. “Sorry, Little One. I’ll drop a dollar into your college fund when I have access to mine again.”

For the rest of the afternoon, until they crawled back inside long after dark, she paced the hallways. Daisy was running program after program trying to decipher the Chronicon language with little to no success. Elena was training in another room. The lab attendants kept their distance from Jemma, though she imagined that was likely because she’d lost her temper with one just a week before when they’d tried to get her to sit down and they were now all afraid to test her.

She’d apologize again later, when she heard what Hunter and Mack had to say.

“The place was pretty much cleaned out, which is exactly what we feared would happen.” Mack began to explain as he walked in first. Hunter was nowhere to be found, but she assumed he was likely behind her at some point. She heard his voice at the very least muttering something indecipherable. “But we found some of Robin’s old drawings and a laptop. We couldn’t get into it on site, but I happen to know a hacker that might.”

Daisy grinned at him as she accepted the laptop, holding it proudly as she rolled her eyes. “Wow, thank you Mack Hammer. I’ll treasure this with my life.”

Mack grunted and rolled his eyes. “I really wish you would stop calling me that,” he muttered, pulling out a tiny folder from behind him, holding it out toward Jemma. “I can’t imagine any of these images are still valid given that they were drawn from before we were kidnapped, but I thought I might as well bring them back with us. They have the same kind of writing all over them. Likely his writing.”

Hunter moved into the room slowly, talking away to a third party that hadn’t made their way into the room yet. Jemma looked up from the folder only when the third voice joined in and nearly dropped the papers she was holding.

“Oh, and we found someone when we were out there!” Hunter announced, although the man hardly needed an introduction now. “He came up to Mack when we were in the street and started talking to him like it was nothing. I almost shot the poor guy.”

Jemma felt frozen in her spot and she opened and closed her mouth several times before she shook her head, a shocked, “Deke?” finally falling out of her. In her bewilderment, she took a step forward. “We thought you had…”

“I’m about as shocked as you are.” He agreed. Jemma looked him over, his fancy suit and his new hair cut and shaved features. She almost wouldn’t have recognized him if it weren’t for the voice, she thought. “I came back to the Lighthouse after everything, but it was all cleared out. I thought you guys might have left and moved elsewhere.” He told her, biting down on his lower lip. “I realize now where you all were.”

Somehow, it seemed, he’d chosen the one day to come back that they’d all been in the wilderness in Canada, burning Fitz’s body into the ashes that she would later disperse in Glasgow.

“Mack told me what happened.” He said softly, swallowing down his own emotions. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here.”

“No,” she murmured, shaking her head. “Its better that you weren’t.”

Deke smiled sadly, nodding shortly. He took a slow breath as he looked away, pressing his lips together. She wondered idly if he’d seen Fitz die in the past, wondered whether he was reliving it now. A part of her didn’t want to know.

“So we uh, we fixed the future, huh?” He asked after a moment, his voice strained. Jemma felt her eyes begin to sting when she lifted her gaze to meet his and saw the unshed tears brimming his own. “That’s good, I guess, isn’t it?”

It was. It was good, but in that moment all she could do was smile sadly back up at him, willing herself not to cry as all of the emotions of that day came back to her one by one. Between learning about Fitz and them not being able to find Deke, she’d thought that she’d lost everything. The only thing that had gotten her through was the reminder that somewhere, lost in the universe, he was still waiting.

Jemma lifted her hand up and cupped his cheek, sharing a quiet moment with him as he dipped his head, acknowledging the bump in between them for the first time. He murmured something underneath his breath that sounded a lot like, “well maybe not everything.”

She could only quietly laugh as her hand fell from his cheek to the round of her bump, where her child kicked under the press of her palm.

“New future,” he said finally, pressing his lips together. He looked somehow even more broken than before. “I suppose that’s for the better.”

Jemma knew what he meant. In the other timeline, the one that they were unsuccessful in, the one he was from, when the world split apart, somewhere along the line she and Fitz had a daughter. She still wasn’t completely sure of the circumstances, or how they had come to bringing her into that world.

But she’d been there. And she’d grown up to be a strong, wonderful woman who’d given life to Deke as well.

And now all of that, in a flash, was gone.

Nothing would heal that ache. If they hadn’t saved the world, if they hadn’t fixed everything, he might’ve gotten a chance to see her again. Jemma pressed her lips together in a thin line.

“It’s for the best,” he said finally, his voice cracking and even though she could feel the hurt radiating off of him, she knew he meant it. “She would have rather this life. She talked about it all the time. The life her parents would have wanted her to have.”

Jemma stilled, breathing out a heavy breath as she dipped her head. That sounded like them both, she realized quietly. “We gave them life. Then and here.” She whispered quietly, running her fingers over the swell of her bump. “This one will be a better one, I hope.”

 

* * *

 

Hi Fitz.

They’re the size of a pineapple today. Isn’t that funny? That still seems so tiny.

I’m definitely not tiny any more. Although, every time I say that, I find myself thinking that you’d argue that I’m beautiful and I can’t help but hate that we’re missing out on that.

It’s such a mundane thing, isn’t it? You’re missing out on everything.

I shouldn’t… no. I shouldn’t focus on that, should I?

I asked Deke about his mother today. I don’t know what came over me. It’s been… different since he’s come back. I think that maybe it’s me. Maybe I feel guilty.

Which is ridiculous, I know. I know he doesn’t feel that way either. He promised me that.

But she was a remarkable woman, Fitz. So strong and so talented. She was… perfect.

She was everything we would have hoped her to be.

I think that, maybe, the cosmos is giving back to us this time, Fitz. You’d probably still argue that we’re cursed but… this is our second chance. This is hers, too, in some way.

Isn't that a lovely thought? I'd like to think so.

Hi, Little One. Yeah, I’m not quite talking about you. Maybe another version of you. We don’t know that yet, do we?

You’re still too little yet for Daddy and I to figure that out. But you’ll be here soon.

Hopefully Daddy will be here too.

I’m working on that, I promise.

 

* * *

 

“It’s too early… they’re still little.”

She’d lost count of how many times she’d said that since the water had pooled around her ankles. Her head felt dizzy and she grasped onto anyone and everyone she could. The only person she recognized in the whole room was Deke, and he looked absolutely terrified.

Possibly more terrified than she looked, which in itself was troubling.

“Na… Jemma.” He let her reach over and grab his hand and didn’t make a sound when she gripped it with every bit of strength that she had left. In fact, he didn’t say anything, which she was thankful for.

The team had left earlier that day, a fuel restock and rover test out before they’d take their voyage – finally – into space. The plan was to have everything in place, if it all went well, before Jemma gave birth.

Except she was, quite literally, in the middle of doing that already. Bloody hell.

Davis’ wife, Alyssa, appeared out of nowhere. She looked much less stressed than the two of them, which was good. At least one of them seemed to have their head on straight.

“It’s too soon…” She murmured, looking over at the woman as she began examining her. She watched Alyssa work, her eyes never leaving the other woman as she straightened back up and met Jemma’s gaze.

“Thirty-six weeks isn’t ideal. I know, Jemma.” She told her calmly, reaching to grab her other hand and squeezing it tightly. “But it’s perfectly safe. We’ll monitor them the whole time. I’ve been squirreling equipment from my practice for weeks now. We’re prepared if you are, Mom.”

Jemma shook her head. How could she be ready? They still didn’t know where Fitz was. He wasn’t here. There wasn’t enough time. Nobody else was there. She needed to get in contact with the team, ask them if the rover had worked. The baby wasn’t supposed to be born today. How could she be ready?

“He’s not here.” She choked out finally amidst her movements, her grip tightening as another contraction rolled through her body and she stiffened, letting out a low groan. She could feel Deke’s eyes on her the entire time.

Alyssa sighed sympathetically, releasing her grip and tapping the top of her hand. “But he will be, right? They’re out there working on that right now.” She lifted her head and met Deke’s gaze. “Go and make contact with the others. She doesn’t have much time left.”

Deke disappeared a second after, or so it seemed, and Jemma wanted to chase after him. They were working on Fitz. They needed to find him. They didn’t need to worry about her. She was fine.

“Jemma, hey, Jemma look at me.” Alyssa waited until she met her gaze. “Your baby is on their way. Just take a deep breath. Everything will be okay.”

Jemma watched as Alyssa stepped away, barking orders around the room. She hadn’t even changed from the outfit she’d been wearing that day. There hadn’t been any time, but a moment later another man came to her side, dressed in scrubs and holding out a gown and introducing himself as Alyssa’s assistant, Eric.

She stared at him, her throat swelling as another contraction rolled through. They were closer now. Five minutes apart.

(If anyone asked, she’d been ignoring them since yesterday, thinking they’d been just Braxton Hicks. She’d prayed that’s all they’d been.)

How could everything be fine when he wasn’t there?

 

* * *

 

Hi, Fitz.

There’s someone you have to meet.

Hi, Little One. Oh, no, no. Shush, sweetheart. He’s not here yet. But he will be soon. I promise.

I’m going to work twice as hard to make sure that happens.

I know by now you’ve probably done the math. It’s early. She is, but she’s okay.

All ten toes and ten fingers. Two ears and perfect little lips and my eyes. Or at least they will be. They’re just a little dark right now.

She’s beautiful, Fitz. And amazing and wonderful and I wish you were here. I wish that more than anything in this world.

Do you want to say hi to Daddy, Rosie?

He’s gonna be so mad he missed you today. But we’ll give him lots of love when we see him next, won’t we?

Shush, Little One. It’s okay.

Fitz, meet Rose Amelia Fitz-Simmons. Rose for your grandmother, and Amelia for mine.

I hope you don’t mind the switch. I thought it rolled off the tongue a little better than Simmons-Fitz.

Oh. You won’t get that, will you? But that’s okay. I’ll make sure to tell you everything when I can.

We’ll have lots to talk about, whenever that is.

Hopefully soon.

Goodnight, Fitz. We love you.

 

* * *

 

If anything good had come from that day, well good besides Rose, it was the news that their expedition had been successful. The deadline seemed somehow tighter with Rose in the midst. Or maybe, perhaps, it was just Jemma’s thoughts on it. He’d already missed so much.

They set out a week after Rose had been born, kisses and hugs and well wishes shared. It’d been almost a month since then. Complete radio silence.

She’d known the voyage they were taken wouldn’t be done overnight. Even with the intense calculations that had been done in preparation of locating a potential area in which the ship could be, she knew that it would likely take a month, if not two, to put it all together. And then getting back out of it, getting back home, could be just as difficult.

It was impossible to expect what could be up there, too, and the problems they could run into.

But still, the waiting was, perhaps, the most difficult part. There was complete radio silence. Not that, realistically, she’d expected any less.

Hunter, of all people, had stayed.

He’d joked countlessly about needing to stay for Rose, because she’d asked him to, but when Bobbi showed up a few days afterwards, she knew what it had been all along.

Nonetheless, the two of them were in love with the youngest member of the team, and had been an absolute gift in the times when she’d really needed just a quick cat nap to get through the remainder of the day.

Rose, for her part, was a gift, really. When she wasn’t eating, she was sleeping, and the few times that she had, unfortunately, been fussy, she’d calm down the moment that she was in someone’s arms.

Every little tiny thing about her reminded her of Fitz. From the gentle curve of her mouth, to the way she’d furrow her eyebrows when she was concentrating. She was tiny, impossibly so, but growing bigger every day. She was healthy, and happy, and that mattered most of all.

She ate just as much as he did, too. It was almost impossible to keep up from time to time.

Jemma hummed as they walked down the halls, a softer rendition of ‘you are my sunshine’ that almost always got Rose to sleep when she was fighting it. Today had been a particularly bad day of hers, but it hadn’t been a good one for Jemma, either.

She knew that she was, obviously, letting the worry get the best of her. They knew what they were doing. They were prepared for almost everything. Everything would be fine. She just needed a little patience.

And maybe, in a way, it was harder now; their daughter sleeping against her chest and the reminder that her father was still nowhere to be found. Jemma settled into one of the chairs in the kitchen, pressing a kiss to the top of the baby’s head as she rubbed the length of her back, staring across the room.

When she had a chance, later, she’d set up a secure line to phone her Mum and Fitz’s Mum, too. Tell them the news. But the thought of talking to Mairi when they hadn’t the slightest idea where her son could be always left her unsettled. What would she even say to her?

How could she simplify the last few months of her life, or explain at all that one version of Fitz had died, one that she had married and loved and dispersed the ashes off of the side of a cliff in Scotland? Was there even a way to say that?

“Jemma.” A voice to her side jolted her out of her thoughts and she instinctively tightened her hold on her daughter, looking toward the source. Bobbi stood over her, watching her carefully. Her hair was brunette again, a stark contrast to the blonde haired beauty she’d been the last time they’d seen one another. “Are you okay?”

Jemma pressed her lips into a fine line at how simple the question was, and laughed quietly before shaking her head. God, okay was the very last thing that she was.

“Right,” Bobbi grimaced, sitting in the chair next to her. “That was probably a dumb question, wasn’t it?”

Rose squirmed in her wrap and Jemma ran her fingers across her back softly as she attempted to sooth her, adjusting the knit cap that she thought Daisy had brought back from one of their missions many months before after her secret had been revealed. It was a bit too big for her, yet, but it kept her warm.

She was still so tiny, even at just over a month old now, and Jemma worried about things like that every day. Almost as much as she worried about Fitz and the team returning home. Or whether or not Rose was eating enough, though she’d been assured countless times that she absolutely was. And that she was gaining weight at a perfectly healthy rate, even if she was still tiny.

“You know, I can’t say that I ever thought you two would get your shit together when we left,” Bobbi laughed quietly, pressing her lips together when Jemma shot her a look. “Sorry, crap.” She corrected, poking her tongue out in a way that made Jemma settle a little and laugh, too. “Let alone get together, get torn apart by some weird Robot thing Fitz helped build and then torn apart again by a portal to space, only to find one another, get married and get pulled apart again.” She shook her head quietly, shrugging her shoulder when Jemma looked again, confusion on her features. “Hunter told me.”

Jemma nodded slowly, a wry smile tugging at her cheeks. “Fitz would say we’re cursed.”

Bobbi laughed abruptly, but quietly, careful of the sleeping babe. Hunter hadn’t figured out that maneuver yet. “Yeah, Hunter told me about that, too. I mean, it does seem like it, I have to agree, but I think the little one there is enough proof that the universe is doing something right.”

Rose snuffled against Jemma’s chest, as though agreeing. Jemma smiled softly, bending to lean her cheek against the top of her head.

“Good evening ladies, plotting my murder as usual, I imagine?” Hunter said, his voice surprisingly quieter than normal as he entered the kitchen and opened the fridge, pulling out a bottle of water and then leaning against the counter.

“Always,” Jemma said at the same time as Bobbi blurted, “Of course.” The two women looked between each other before laughing quietly, careful not to wake Rose.

He looked between them incredulously, or at the very least feigning his surprise. “Not you too, Jemma.” He sighed dramatically, laying his water bottle down. “You know, I can’t wait until Fitz comes back,” Hunter said, throwing his hands on his hips. “I’ll feel a lot less ganged up on all the time.”

Bobbi rolled her eyes and shared a small smile with Jemma as the latter stood up, stretching out her limbs before wrapping her arms around the wrap that Rose slept in. “I think Fitz is going to have his attention elsewhere when he comes back, Hunter,” she reminded him.

Rose squirmed a little, one hand popping out from the binding and splaying on Jemma’s chest as she opened her eyes and lifted her gaze up toward Jemma silently.

“Yeah,” Hunter murmured, watching the two from afar. “You might be right there.”

 

* * *

 

Hi, Fitz.

We heard back from them today. They haven’t found you yet, but they’re hopeful.

Rosie’s feeling a little grumpy today. She gets that from you. She woke up early in her crib and I was nowhere to be seen and apparently that’s the call for a grumpy day. It’s her first, and I wish I could say it’s easy, but it’s really not. At least she still likes cuddles.

Or maybe it’s just you. She seems to quiet down every time I wrap her up in your cardigan. That’s what we’re doing now. I think she likes your scent.

It’s okay, though, because I like it, too.

You feel better, don't you, Little One?

Yeah, me too.

I guess I win the most romantic one, don't I, Fitz? I've got her and I wrapped up in your cardigan and the only thing I can think of is that I almost have my whole world in my arms. Isn't that silly?

I can’t help but feel impatient, but also absolutely bloody terrified. I haven’t the slightest idea what I’m going to tell you when we see you again.

Come back to us, Fitz. Please.

 

* * *

 

 

Jemma felt like every moment since they’d gotten contact from the Zephyr had dragged on. Every single second somehow felt longer than the last, and while Hunter was trying to kill the tension in the room by cracking jokes about her wearing a hole in the floor before they got back, she couldn’t help but pace.

It calmed her. Rose was unsettled because she was. And she was already grumpy that morning, having fallen asleep in the midst of a feeding and been woken up to burp had been her least favorite thing to do that morning, because as Jemma had learned, if there was anything that Rose loved more than eating, it was sleeping.

She really was her father’s child.

“They told us it would be a couple of days before they broke the Earth’s atmosphere, Jemma.” Bobbi remained the voice of reason, which she appreciated. She almost needed that now. Hunter tried and did his best, and she adored him for it, but she was too tense to laugh. Which seemed outlandish. She just needed to know that everything was okay.

The communications that they’d had from the Zephyr since it had gone into space had been minimal. Just a quick note here and there. It had been enough to keep her going, the reminder that they were out there searching for him.

But now they had him, and all she wanted to do was beg them to hurry up and get back home. She was just about off her head. And she herself might’ve been just the slightest bit grumpy. Just a tad.

Deke had stopped by earlier, having his own earth job now that apparently hadn’t required any proper documentation of any kind and Jemma wasn’t completely sure he was getting paid for, and he’d unfortunately seen the wrong side of her. She’d apologized after the fact, and she’d heard Bobbi explaining the circumstances and the reason for her tension, but she couldn’t help but continue wandering around the base, waiting and wondering.

They’d made contact three days before. The only estimate of time they’d been given was ‘days’. Which meant more than one. And that was if they didn’t run into any trouble. Wait, what if that was the reason for the delay? What if they were in trouble?

Bloody hell. She hadn’t thought of that one.

Jemma nearly jumped out of her skin when two hands grabbed her shoulders and steadied her and she took another moment to focus, realizing that it was Bobbi holding her still. She blinked a couple of times, letting out a shaky sigh.

“Jemma,” Bobbi calmly started, rubbing her shoulders gently. “Come on, everything’s okay. I can almost hear the wires in your brain short circuiting. How about Hunter and I look after Rose for a bit and you can take a small nap?” She offered. When Jemma’s hesitancy became apparent, she sighed gently. “We’ll call you if anything changes and if we hear back from them, alright?”

Realistically, she knew that stressing herself out more wouldn’t result in either of them being happy. Especially not Rose, who was happy enough to be carried around and tired enough to sleep through most of her mother’s pacing. But she just needed, wanted, hoped that everything was okay and that she’d be able to see him soon.

She still hadn’t the slightest clue what she was going to say to him, but of course, she was sure that she could work something out. Maybe that was what she would do instead of napping. Plan it out. She excelled at preparation.

With a slight nod, she untangled the wrap from around her body, gently lifting Rose up and away from her body. The baby wriggled a little when she settled in Bobbi’s arms, but didn’t wake.

Jemma let out a soft sigh of relief and smiled softly at them both. “I’ll see you both later.” She promised, and then took the long way back to her bunk, thinking deeply about everything that had happened since they’d been kidnapped and since Fitz had been left behind. How their timelines no longer matched.

He’d lived six months that she had not, and then frozen himself in order to get himself to the future in the first place. It was all a tad bit overwhelming even for her. She couldn’t even wrap her mind around what it would be for him.

Fitz wouldn’t expect to be woken up early. He would have been prepared to make his way to them, to save them. He hadn’t been aware that he already had.

She wondered if they would have told him anything and wished immensely that she would have been able to make the trip. If for nothing else, but to be the first person he saw when he woke up. It might’ve made things a little bit better.

Or it might’ve made them insanely worse. She was worried about that possibility as well.

Jemma slipped into the bunk that had been theirs, feeling oddly open in the space. The suitcase that she’d packed for him was missing; she’d given that to Daisy before she’d taken off but on the side table, the picture of them from the Academy was there.

She picked it up, tracing over his features.

“We couldn’t have known then, could we have, Fitz? What the world had planned for us?”

She sunk back into the bed, her plans of putting together a logical statement of what had happened for him aborted and she moved, clutching the picture to her chest as her eyes fell shut and she dozed off.

 

* * *

 

The team made contact two days later. They were flying over Canada, and would be there by the end of the evening.

Jemma had never felt such a mixed sense of relief and fear in her life. Rose seemed oblivious to it all, which she was almost thankful for. She had no idea that Daddy was coming home today, or what that even meant, despite knowing his face and his voice.

Jemma had spent every day since she’d been born showing her everything she had of Fitz. From their wedding video, to the video he’d made for her birthday when she was undercover in the academy, to everything in between.

Daddy was an important figure, even while being a near imaginary friend in his own daughter’s mind. A daughter he didn’t even know that was alive. Well, hopefully.

She wished she’d have a chance to talk to Daisy or Mack when they landed, but the moment the Zephyr dropped down into the Lighthouse and the ramp began dropping, her eyes were searching for his.

Rose was tucked away in their bedroom just down the hall. The baby monitor that she’d bought tucked in Bobbi’s pocket. She hadn’t even had to ask the other woman to give them a moment before breaking the news to Fitz.

He was going to be so confused, the poor thing.

The ramp door hit the ground, and it was only sound that reverberated other than the sound of her pulsing heart. Before she could stop herself, she was rushing forward, and somewhere in the middle, he met her.

He arms tightened around his neck and she stretched on her tiptoes to keep him close, and she was vaguely aware that the grip he had on her was just as tight, if not almost bruising. He murmured something into her neck, something completely indecipherable, and she held on tighter.

She was only vaguely aware that the both of them were crying, but it hardly seemed to matter. It’d been almost a year since she’d last seen him. Well, one version of him at least, and she didn’t want to waste another moment away from him.

Fitz adjusted, letting her feet hit the ground again but didn’t loosen his grip. Instead, he pressed kisses wherever his lips could reach and she tangled her fingers in his hair, pressing a kiss against his temple. He was still cold to the touch, but she imagined that cryostasis would settle in his body for a few days yet.

There was so much they didn’t know about the process. So much she had to ask.

Fitz spoke, though the sound was muffled into her shoulder, and she lurched forward, trying to hear just exactly what he was saying. He lifted his head, kissing her neck and the side of her head, but not pulling completely away from her. After a moment, his muffled words became clear – “Marry me.”

She stopped, a memory of a man who’d never gotten to ask her that question properly because of the circumstances flooding her all at once, but just the same as it would have been then, her answer was as clear as ever now.

“Of course, I will,” she murmured, forgetting for a selfish moment all the things she had to tell him. “Yes, Fitz. Yes.”

 

* * *

 

In the end, the easiest place to start for him is the beginning. Starting with the day at that diner when he woke up and found out that they weren’t there. Fitz knew more than she did, about why and how they were taken, and she listened to every word, the pieces coming together in her head for the first time.

She wondered briefly why they hadn’t taken a chance before everything had went to absolute shit to do that.

Fitz learned that he’d made it to the future in one timeline. It was a bit messy now to explain, given that they’d interrupted his journey in this time. Jemma stumbled over words and explanations, trying to put the pieces together for him, and for his part, he hung onto every word.

It must have been a bit disorienting at times, learning about actions and things that the man who’d made it to the future had done. Jemma watched him, almost analyzing every reaction. Despite the desire to skip over certain parts, especially the one that she herself hadn’t taken a moment to think over since they had happened, she told him too, about what that man had suffered.

Fitz only dipped his head in response.

She made him promise, then, to be honest and open with her. To let her know if anything ever spiked. Whenever he heard The Doctor in the back of his head telling him to do something outlandish and crazy. Or just when he heard him at all. And that they would work on that, and work on helping him.

It felt like the second chance that they hadn’t been able to be granted in the past. And she held onto that as best as she could, hoping that it could somehow make all of this better. Or at the very least manageable.

By the time she made it to his death, she was crying. In the beginning, the first few months after he’d passed, she’d spent a great deal of time thinking over every detail. When she hadn’t been looking for Fitz, she’d been wallowing in her own guilt.

But she hadn’t had a chance to think about it lately, and she’d never allowed herself a moment to cry about it before. All of that came back to her all at once and she sobbed around the explanation of his death and Coulson’s. And the absence of a team member they weren’t quite sure would ever return.

And then, all that was left was the months that had passed since the other Fitz had died and Jemma had devoted herself to finding him again. And all she could do was stare at him, willing the words to spill out and make sense simultaneously.

While the rest of her story had been the truth, it had been the easy truth. She’d been able to rhyme it off exactly how she remembered it. But it wasn’t quite the same as the truth that happened afterwards. Because while Fitz had made it to the future in one timeline but not in another, that hadn’t been the part in which Jemma had worried about disclosing to him.

It was the tiny person two doors down who hopefully still slept soundly, despite all the chaos happening around her.

She suddenly wished that that was all she had to tell him. That this were months before and she didn’t have to tell him about any entire milestone of theirs that he had missed, other than their wedding.

(He’d had enough questions about that, but she had been happy enough to remind him that it hadn’t mattered which version of Fitz she’d married. She’d marry him in every timeline, in every world, every chance she got. She’d marry him all over again. It hadn’t completely erased the guilt, but they would work on that.)

Fitz watched her for another moment after her long bout of silence, confusion on his features as he waited for another moment before standing. It took Jemma a second to realize that he’d took her silence as the end to their story, not her stalling telling him the last part.

He began searching through the items he had until he picked up a pair of socks. They were shaggy and well worn, or at least appeared that way, and as he flipped them inside out, she saw nothing but air. Fitz pursed his lips together and dropped them back into the suitcase that he’d just pulled them out of and touched the top of the empty space in his hand and before their eyes, she saw a box begin to appear.

“You didn’t really think I’d be daft enough to hide it in plain sight around you?” He asked once he noticed her curious posture. Jemma shrugged one shoulder. “Although, I am surprised that he never pulled this one out.”

“Deke got our rings for us.” She answered before he had a chance to say anything else. “He probably just forgot about it.”

Fitz nodded, moving toward her slowly and carefully. She noticed his hand trembling as he took the ring out of the box and laid it to the side before sitting back on the bed where they’d spent the greater portion of an hour talking.

(Really, now that she’d thought about it, they were lucky they weren’t interrupted by Rose and her belly.)

Jemma reached over and laid her hand on top of his, a soft, gentle smile crossing her features. “Fitz,” she murmured gently, meeting his gaze. “I’ve already said yes.”

He nodded, but his grip on the ring didn’t loosen. “I know. It’s just…” He shook his head, pressing his lips together in a thin line. “I had a speech planned. I must have written it a hundred times over while I was imprisoned.”

Jemma smiled despite herself, somehow even wider before as she reached across, gently taking his other hand in hers. “I think you’ve already made your big gesture, Fitz.”

He smiled softly and slowly, his hands shaking when he moved to grab her hand gently and held it close, kissing the spot where her ring would sit before he slid it on her finger slowly.

Jemma lifted it up, inspecting it close for the first time. After a moment, the realization kicked in. “Fitz, is this…?”

He nodded, lacing the fingers of their other hands together. “My grandmother’s, yeah.” He smiled a little sheepishly, dipping his head. “I told my Mum to send it out before… everything.”

She swallowed hard, her breath shaky as she admired it, gently dropping it out of her view before commenting quietly, “how appropriate.”

Fitz looked at her, his eyebrows furrowing as she grabbed his other hand with hers and laced both of them together, pulling her lower lip between her teeth. For a moment, she sat there, unable to completely look at him, but unable to stare anywhere but him at the same time.

They had mere moments before Rose Amelia would make her presence known to the entirety of the base. She was due for another feeding. She couldn’t delay it anymore.

“Fitz,” she murmured quietly. “I haven’t been completely honest with you about everything.”

The look on his face when she said that made her want to cry already, and she’d barely even begun. Pressing her lips together into a thin line, she tried to find a proper way to phrase this, one that wouldn’t ruin everything that they’d been working so hard to build together in the last few moments.

But how did you tell someone who had been gone for as long as he had that in the time he’d been gone, in the time that they had been working so desperately to get him back, he’d become a father and hadn’t even known it? Where was the handbook on that?

“Shortly after everything,” she began quietly, dropping her gaze to their linked hands. “Shortly after you were whisked away into the wind…” She continued, her breath shaky and her words shakier. “I found out I was pregnant, Fitz.”

In all of the reactions that she’d played over in her head, silence was not one of them. She’d expected questions, maybe even disbelief, but when she finally willed herself the courage to look up into his deep blue eyes and saw the pure shock and confusion that laced his features, but the silence that had enveloped them both, she felt the urge to cry even more.

When he didn’t say anything, and the silence in the room threatened to drown her, she let out a shaky breath. “Her name is Rose Amelia,” she murmured gingerly. “It’s not - she’s not...” Jemma’s voice splintered off and shook. “His.” She whispered even more quietly, as if the walls might crumble down around them.   
  
Fitz turned to her, more confusion on his features than ever. “I don’t... I don’t understand.”  
  
He’d lost a lot more than six months in that prison. He’d lost a sense of himself. Thought about her every day until he found himself mindlessly sketching what she looked like in the morning with the sun’s rays painting her skin. But for everything he’d lost, she’d lost just as much.   
  
Her husband. Her future. Him.   
  
“We didn’t lose six months. Not... not physically.” She tried to explain as easily as she could. “Our time in space was days. A week or two at most.” Jemma swallowed as she dipped her head, too. “And then, when we came back. It all happened so fast. In total, it might have been a month. Maybe a month and a half. But if my calculations were right, I was close to ten weeks.”  
  
Fitz did the math, his lips pursing. His perception of time was off. Between the six months he’d spent in prison and the apparent year in cryostasis, his brain was foggy. As though he couldn’t clear it. And then, all at once, his eyes reached to meet hers. “Jemma,” his voice was strained, the weight of everything seeming falling on him all at once. “You were pregnant when you were in the Framework?”  
  
The timing added up, for her at least. It was still strange. There was six months he’d lived that she had not.   
  
Jemma dipped her gaze away from his, because she’d already gone through that thought a hundred times over. When their daughter was still growing within her where she could still protect her at all times.  
  
“I know,” she whispered quietly. “I know.”

She wouldn’t argue the semantics, and how it wasn’t as though she’d been ready to give birth whilst in that prison. None of that mattered.

“I uhm, I took videos.” She told him quietly. “From the moment I found out about her until just days before I found out they found you.” Jemma remembered every single one of those videos. Much the same as she remembered every single thing that she’d shown their daughter whilst introducing her to her father. “I’d hoped that we would find you before she was born. Well before that, actually.”

Fitz nodded, processing this new information as quickly as she could imagine he could. It wasn’t as though she had simply announced that she’d adopted a cat while he was gone. It was much greater than that. She’d grown a child while he’d been gone. A beautiful, tiny little being that knew the sound of her voice and his.

It wasn’t an easy thing to pass off, or to think through. She knew that just as well as he had.

“Could I…” He began after a moment, pressing his lips together as he lifted his gaze toward hers. “Could I see her?”

Jemma softened immediately, nodding her head and standing up perhaps a little too quickly. “Of course,” she said quickly, moving toward the door. He followed her every movement, seemingly analyzing every step. “I’ll, uh, I’ll go get her. If you’d like,” she added, feeling suddenly shy.

She wished more than ever now that they had been successful in putting the pieces together before Rose had been born, so that she didn’t feel so much like she was introducing a part of his life that he could have never planned for, one that they hadn’t even thought about before. They’d never talked about children… let alone having one while still in S.H.I.E.L.D. (Or whatever the hell they could call the organization they worked for now.)

Was she, perhaps, too forward in thinking that they wanted that? She’d never even considered it as an option. Even before Rose was an actual being growing within her womb, she’d always seen them with a child or two. Little beings they would help mold and grow together.

“I’d like that,” he said after a moment, and in that moment she realized how silly she was to have any of those worries. “I think we’re well overdue for that, aren’t we?”

Jemma smiled about that the entire way to the bunk that Bobbi had been watching Rose in while they talked, and while Jemma had no more answers than what Bobbi did about what was going on, when she collected her daughter into her arms, trying to be as dainty as possible with the sleeping infant, she felt hope. And for a moment, that was enough.

Rose barely stirred the entire walk back to their room, only snuffling quietly as she tucked her head into the crook of Jemma’s neck. Jemma’s heart felt as though it was in her throat when she stepped into the bedroom finally, a tiny smile reaching her features. “Hi, Fitz.” She said quietly, taking a few steps toward him.

“She’s tiny,” he said, just as quietly as she approached, his eyes never leaving the tiny bundle laying against Jemma’s chest. “Is she…?”

“She’s perfect, Fitz.” She whispered back, tracing her fingers along the baby’s back. Rose was, perhaps, just a few ounces under what a baby of her age was, but it was nothing serious. Nothing that Alyssa was worried about. “She’s healthy and happy. And perhaps just a little bit too eager to meet us, weren’t you, baby?”

Fitz paled at those words, reaching up to press the tips of his fingers along her spine. “She was early?” He murmured quietly, a slight shakiness to his voice as he spoke.

She hadn’t even realized that she’d left that out until he’d brought it up. With a slight nod, she swallowed hard, meeting his gaze. “Just a couple of weeks,” she answered in that same quiet tone. “But she’s okay, Fitz. Completely healthy. Completely happy.”

He nodded curtly, the movement jerky. She understood the worry, and if anything, it only made her love him all the more. He’d barely known about her for twenty minutes and he was already so protective of her. “May I?” He said after a moment, holding his hands out. And even though they shook roughly, there was nothing in the world that would make her trust him less.

“Sit back,” she murmured gently, waiting until he took her directions before she shifted, supporting the back of the baby’s head. She was getting stronger everyday, but she still wasn’t quite there yet. With the other hand along her back, she lifted her away from her body, gently laying her in Fitz’s arms.

Rose looked impossibly smaller there somehow.

Fitz adjusted his hold, tucking Rose’s head in the crook of his arm. The hat that Daisy had bought her was almost too small now, but he tugged it over her ears nonetheless. He sniffled softly, pressing his lips together as he watched her.

Rose stirred, and for a moment Jemma held her breath, wondering if she would wake up and freeze. But after a moment, the baby opened her eyes, looking toward Fitz with a slight curiosity in her honeyed hues before she smiled up at him. Fitz gently smiled back, offering her up his finger, which she grabbed and held onto with both of her tiny hands, her eyes never leaving his. It was almost as though she was studying him.

And then, all at once, she relaxed, holding tightly onto his finger and watching him all the same.

“Hi,” he whispered softly, his voice rough. Rose smiled again, something that she was becoming more frequent with in recent weeks, and the only thing he could do was laugh and smile back.

It almost felt like, _Oh, there you are. We’ve been waiting for you_.

“She knows your voice,” Jemma commented as she slowly sat beside him, leaning her chin on his shoulder. She peaked over, catching her daughter’s gaze, but not keeping it. “And who you are. I made sure of that.”

“She’s wonderful,” Fitz breathed all at once, completely entranced in the babe as her eyelids began to flutter shut and all at once, she was asleep, her grip never loosening on Fitz’s finger, as though it was her safety net. “I suppose it’s just like us to do all of this backwards, isn’t it?”

Jemma laughed softly, leaning her head against his shoulder and winding her arms around them both, content to hold them both as close as possible. “Yeah, Fitz,” she murmured softly. “I think you’re right.”

 

* * *

 

“Rosie,” Fitz sung as he moved into her room, which was thankfully still next door to their own, but divided by a wall now. Jemma hadn’t been on board with the plan in the first place, but it made sense. Giving Rose her own space was just as much for her as it was for them.

In the middle of a growing pile of stuffed animals sat their vibrant one-year-old, having an animated conversation with her favorite stuffed animal, a Monkey aptly named Monkey.

Fitz bent down to her height, catching her gaze. Rose grinned up at him and gestured toward Monkey before babbling on about something and he nodded. “Ah, well, Monkey, that was nice of you. Wasn’t that nice of Monkey, Rosie?”

Rose giggled and patted Monkey on the nose and hugged him to her side before releasing him.

“How about we go get some lunch, Rosie?” He asked her gently, holding out his hand. “Your Mummy and Auntie Bobbi and Auntie Daisy will be back from their mission any moment now, and we wouldn’t want to be all grumpy and hungry once Mummy comes back, would we?”

Rose grabbed for Monkey, even though the bear was a little too heavy for her to carry around, and shuffled toward Fitz, holding her arms straight up. When he didn’t immediately pick her up, she made a frustrated whining sound and grumbled.

“Dada!” She cried, pursing her bottom lip out.

He wondered idly for a moment where she’d learned that from before the gravity of what she had just said fell on him and he bent, swooping up the baby. Rosie laughed loudly as he adjusted her on his hip.

God, Jemma owed him twenty bucks and something else he wasn’t going to say around their one-year-old.

“You said Dada,” he cried happily, pressing a big, wet kiss to her cheek. Rose leaned into it, laughing quietly before she poked her belly and pointed toward the door, babbling something he couldn’t quite decipher.

He’d get her to say it again when Mummy came home, just to finalize their bet, but for now, Rosie was right. It was lunch time.

And with Mummy not around, maybe Daddy could sneak a tiny pizza for them and Hunter.

“Rosie can keep a secret, right?” He asked as he opened the door, moving down the hallway toward where he was sure Hunter was hiding up in the living room, no doubt preparing to watch the match.

Rose nodded her head, squeezing Monkey closer to her body and nodded, babbling something that sounded like ‘yeah, yeah’ but also could have been a number of other collective sounds. They were still working out the kinks there.

In the end, they might have done quite literally everything out of order, but when Jemma came home an hour or two later with Bobbi and Daisy in tow, looking as beautiful as the day he’d married her (which was, coincidentally, just a handful of days before), he found it impossible to be disappointed about it.

It seemed like maybe they weren’t cursed after all.

 

* * *

 

Oh, Hi, Hi Little One. There you are.

Oh, she’s so tiny. Is she okay? She’s okay, isn’t she?

Okay, good. Because she needs to be okay. She’s so tiny. Oh my goodness, you’re so tiny.

Hi, beautiful. Oh, I know, it’s cold in here, isn’t it? Here, you can have some of my blanket. Oh goodness, I am so happy to meet you, Little One, but I would have appreciated if you’d come on time. You’re just as stubborn as your Daddy, huh?

All right, you’re right. You just might get a smidgen of that from me, too.

_Jemma, we’re going to have to take her to get weighed and such in a moment_.

Yes, okay. That’s fine. But bring her back. Because she’s little and she’s tiny and I need to keep her warm.

_We’ll take good care of her, hon. Just a few minutes and she’ll be right back_.

Okay. Just another minute. Oh darling, I wish your Daddy were here, although between you and me, I think he might’ve passed out ages ago. He’s not very good with bodily fluids. One day he’ll tell you the story about the cat liver and you’ll learn all about that.

Your Daddy is very silly. I must warn you about that now.

_Do we have a name for her, Mom?_

Oh, yes, of course. Rose. It’s Rose.


End file.
